Read more: Game of Thrones Seaosn 8 Predictions and Theories Look, I could have written about Sansa, or Jamie, Qyburn, maybe even Varys, but if you think I was going to relegate my dude here to just once sentence in the Quick Hits, then you’ve been sleeping on me. This guy is just out here doing what he loves, making meat-filled pastries for hungry bellies. He’s got the scoop on all the comings and goings of Westeros. Still thinks armor is all it takes to be a knight, bless his heart. I bet the other kitchen workers don’t have pretty girls from famous families coming to visit them! A sight for sore eyes, my darling Hot Pie. HOT PIE!!! The kid! Out there whipping ‘em up fresh, living his best life. Herbert the Pervert is quite the Reggie Miller of Westeros. In my eyes, Littlefinger just got into the White Wolf’s head. Unfortunately for Ned, we know how that one ended up. In the end, he gets choked in an eerily similar fashion to a time that Ned laid hands on Littlefinger back in Season One. Littlefinger is feeling himself so hard after receiving the news that he not-so-subtly cops to wanting to tap that right to her brother’s face. If Littlefinger was ever going to manipulate Sansa into something major, now is the time.
Jon Snow is heading off to Dragonstone and he’s left Sansa in charge in his absence. The tape this week is going to say that Littlefinger should be in the loser column again, but I think that oily prick ended “Stormborn” right where he wanted to be. Cersei is still most definitely going down, Maggy the Frog don’t lie, but she’s going to Atlanta Falcons this thing and do everything to make you think that she could win before imploding spectacularly. Also, squirrely Qyburn is down in the lab whipping up the Seven Kingdom’s first anti-aircraft weapon like he can actually take down a dragon. With the help of her brother Jamie, the Lannisters have worked to convince the remaining loyal houses to fight against the Mad King’s daughter and her horde of terrifying Others. Up there on the pulpit spreading xenophobia and fear, Cersei was one “fake news” mention away from being president material by today’s standards. Cersei LannisterĬersei may have been born to politic. I’m not sure if this means that Arya is going to abandon her plans of going home now, realizing that’s “not her” anymore, or if she was trying respect the new life that her direwolf had forged just as she had been forced to do, but it was a sweet and nostalgic week for Lady Stark. Arya tries to persuade the giant wolf to come home with her, but then says “that’s not you,” a callback to a conversation she had with her father, when she replied to the potential future of being a common lady by saying “that’s not me.” She lets Nymeria go in another moment of self-discovery from the former faceless woman. It seems like the revenge tour is going to have to wait, until Arya runs into another old friend, her direwolf Nymeria. I think the only time Arya has gotten good news in seven seasons is when she found out that she wasn’t going to have to be blind forever, so our girl was pretty excited to hear this. Friends don’t pay, so our girl Arya gets to chow down on Hot Pie’s namesake and drink some ale all while getting compliments for being pretty, basically every girl’s dream, right? Oh, and Hot Pie delivers an absolute stunner of a newsflash, cluing in Arya to the fact that her brother Jon Snow has taken back Winterfell and has been named the King in the North. The Arya Stark Revenge Tour hit the old stomping grounds this week, returning to the inn where Arya’s closest friend in the whole world (don’t question it) Hot Pie works.